Employer Applications: An Idea Whose Time Has Come?

Ah, yes.  The dreaded job application - every candidate's guaranteed eye-roller.  ("Please summarize the last 20 years of your life, including every supervisor you've ever had, the dates for every job you've ever had, any gaps between employment, making sure to translate your past experiences into ones we can relate to using our keywords and phrases...")  The only thing perhaps more cumbersome and complex is your annual 1040 tax form. 

But, as with taxes, the form is a must - but why is it only the candidate who must fill one out?  Granted, it's the candidate who is applying for the job, but shouldn't you as that candidate be entitled to the very same information about your prospective employer?  What's THEIR greatest weakness or failure?  What was the CEO's SAT scores in high school and his or her GPA?  If the company is going to run a credit and criminal background check on you - and you can rest assured that they probably will - shouldn't you be able to know if the CEO is making his child support payments to his third ex-wife?

With that in mind, here's a proposed template for employers' applications - feel free to copy and forward.  Or, better still, offer some suggestions of your own.

Application for Employer Consideration

Name of Company:

CEO:

Please attach a transcript that includes the CEO's GPA and relevant scholastic achievements.  This can include (but is not limited to) SAT, GRE, GMAT scores.

Supervisor's Name:

Please attach a transcript that includes the supervisor's GPA and relevant scholastic achievements.  This can include (but is not limited to) SAT, GRE, and GMAT scores.

Names of Internal Candidates Who Want This Job and Who Will Likely Resent Me if I Get It:

In the space below, please provide answers to the following questions:

1.  What is the average length of employment with your firm?

2.  What is the biggest strength of working here?  What is the biggest drawback?  Explain.

3.  Where do you see this company in 3-5 years?  Why?

4.  Please describe your firm's bigggest failure(s).  What did you learn from the experience? 

5.  How many of your supervisors have been referred for anger management training in the last twelve months?

6.  Which of the following have occurred in the last five years?

a.  Lawsuit

b.  Settlement

c.  Downsizing or Restructuring

d.  Buyout Consideration

e.  Pay or Hiring Freezes

f.  Workplace Incident(s)

7.  What is the rate of turnover in this position?  Why?

8.  What is the vesting period for 401(k)?  (Please note question #7 above.)

9.  Number of supervisors who have signed diversity pledges but who only hire people like themselves:

10.  In the space below, please provide the names of five (5) former employees willing to discuss their experiences with your firm:
a.____________
b.____________
c.____________
d.____________
e.____________