Friday Funnies

Sales people took a good ribbing last week, so I figured it was only fair to share the joy with another profession.  Enjoy the weekend!

*****

What's the difference between engineers and architects?
Engineers build weapons; architects build targets.

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Is a glass half-empty or half-full?
Pessimist:  "Half-empty."
Optimist:  "Half-full."
Engineer:  "Empty or full is irrelevant; the glass is simply twice as large as it needs to be."

*****

A mathematecian, a physicist, and a statistician are asked a simple question, "What is two plus two?"  The mathematcian scribbles the equation on the chalkboard to make sure there are no tricks and replies simply, "Two."  Not to be outdone, the physicist pulls out a pocket calculator and begins typing frantically.  After several minutes, he looks up, "In nearly every conceivable instance, two plus two will equal four."  The statistician looks at them both and shakes his head.  Pulling the questioner aside, he whispers to him, "Tell me how much you want it to be..."

******

The container can accommodate approximately 60-62 units, with varying degrees of additional or excess capacity depending on the given variables.
Mathematics major

An examination of the construction methodology leads me to conclude that in most instances, the container is fully capable of accommodating 60-63 units given the stress levels associated with the manufacturing and the given variables for mass.  Additional research should be made to ensure greater accuracy of all estimates, however.
Engineering major

Do you want fries with that?
English major.